A few years ago, I went to the movies with a friend. We got a big ol’ bucket of popcorn to share, and before the movie started, it was sitting between us and we were happily sharing it. Then, when the movie began, she casually set the bucket on the floor… on the other side of her.

And that was it. The popcorn might as well have been on the moon because, for the entire movie, I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Seriously. The. Entire. Movie. I don’t even remember the plot of the film. What I do remember is being consumed by popcorn FOMO.

Why didn’t I just ask her to pass it? Good question. Maybe I was being shy. Maybe I didn’t want to interrupt the movie. Maybe I was trying to “be good” and resist temptation. Or maybe I just wanted to test my willpower. Maybe I didn’t want her to know that I wanted more and she was in the way of that happening. Honestly, your guess is as good as mine.

What I do know is that on the way home, I hit a drive-thru for ice cream because I felt so deprived. All that mental energy spent on not having popcorn turned into an all-out snack rebellion.

Here’s the thing: Being too restrictive doesn’t work for me. When I feel deprived, I almost always end up binging later. It’s like my brain needs to reclaim what was “lost.”

Making Peace with Food

I’m still figuring out how to permanently overcome this, but in the meantime, here’s what’s been working for me: I plan for it.

There’s this person I follow on social media (don’t ask me who; my memory fails me sometimes) who talks about eating what she wants while adding what she needs. For example, if she’s craving potato chips, she’ll pair them with a high-protein dip and some cut veggies. Genius, right?

I’ve been trying to follow this model because I know myself. My inner rebel hates rules, especially when it comes to food. If I don’t find a way to make peace with this, I know I’ll never lose the weight—or worse, I’ll stay stuck in this cycle of guilt and overindulgence.

Why Restriction Backfires

Here’s a bit of science to back this up (because it’s not just me, I promise):

• Scarcity Mindset: When we restrict foods, our brain perceives them as rare and puts them on a pedestal. Suddenly, that “off-limits” cookie becomes all you can think about.
• Hormonal Chaos: Prolonged restriction messes with your hunger hormones. Leptin (the satiety hormone) decreases, while ghrelin (the hunger hormone) spikes, making cravings feel impossible to resist.
• Blood Sugar Swings: Cutting out entire food groups—like carbs—can cause low blood sugar, triggering cravings for fast-energy fixes like sugary or high-calorie foods.

The solution? Inclusion, not avoidance. Allowing yourself small, planned indulgences helps satisfy both your physical cravings and your psychological need to feel in control. When food stops being “forbidden,” it stops being such a big deal.

My Plan for Balance

Here’s how I’m learning to navigate cravings without losing my mind (or my progress):

1. Yes, I can have chips, but I pair them with protein and veggies—and I portion them out.
2. Yes, I can have cake, even if it takes me over my calorie goal for the day. The key is deciding in advance, not acting on impulse.
3. Yes, I can have a cookie, but I’ll put it on a plate and enjoy it slowly, instead of wolfing it down between the kitchen and the couch.
4. Yes, I can have pita chips and hummus, but I use my trusty kitchen scale to portion them. (Side note: If you don’t have a kitchen scale, get one. Total game-changer. Way easier and less messy than measuring cups!)

Your Turn

So, how do you moderate? Do you plan indulgences, or do you have another trick to make peace with food? Let’s swap ideas—because if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that we’re all in this together.